he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
i out mim tonsoeep
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