at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
