i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
