ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize