Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
