Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
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