Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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