would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize