the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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