Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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