Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
