Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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