I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
