I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
