We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
