i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
