My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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