i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
