I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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