i wish there were pregnant emoticons
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize