i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
