he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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