Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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