he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
