so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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