Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
even my farts smell like vagina
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
