Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
