I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
