Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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