On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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