I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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