That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
