i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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