chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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