Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
