"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
