East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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