we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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