chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Did I show you my penis last night?
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
