there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
