fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
a search helicopter?!
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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