I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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