i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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