Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize