I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
