i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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