Rock
Scissors
Fuck
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
