if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Is it because I queefed?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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