THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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