I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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