is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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