come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
